Intelligence and Twice the Idiocy
by Kuro-Mei
Summary: Kurama, Yusuke, and Kuwabara are going off to college. The three are roommates for the next four years. This is how the three will survive.
1. On the Road to College

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho! But if I did... well, that's a different story.

* * *

Kurama was packing his stuff before he left to go off to college. Once he was done, he made his way downstairs to the kitchen, where he could smell his mother's great cooking. 

"Well, mother, I'm leaving," Shuuichi said, grabbing the keys to his new Corvette.

"Don't you want a bite to eat befor you leave, Shuuichi?" his mother asked him.

"No thank you, kaasan."

As Kurama left, his mother told him, "Don't forget, Shuuichi! Clean up after yourself... and don't use all you money in such a short period of time, especially what happened after that Yusuke got four speeding tickets in less than a week!"

Kurama assured his mother that he understood what she had said.

Once Kurama got outside, he saw Hiei sitting on top of the Corvette.

"Took you long enough, Kurama," Hiei replied, as he got down from the car. " Don't you realize how hot it is out here?"

"I'm sorry, Hiei," Kurama apologized, getting into the car.

Kurama started driving away. It took a couple of hours to get to the college. On the way there, Kurama stopped by a gas station. While they were waiting for the gas to fill up, Hiei was looking through Kurama's bags.  
Then, he found an empty duffel bag.

"Um, Kurama?" Hiei said, a bit worried. "Why do you have an empty bag back here? And why are there holes**(1)**?"

Kurama purposely ignored hiim by taking his cell phone out**(2)** and pretending to call his mother.

"Uh, hello, kaasan," Kurama said.

"You talkin' to yourself?" Hiei teased him. "I know you heard me, fox. Now answer my question."

Kurama got in the car and started it. "You'll find out."

* * *

Later, after arriving at the school, Hiei found himself in that same duffel bag. "I guess this could be a good excuse for my death... suffocation," Hiei replied, emotionlessly. 

"Just stay quiet," Kurama said, zipping up the bag. "At least there are holes for you to breath through."

Kurama started walking to the apartments, sitting next to the school.

"Here's another excuse... I'll go blind," Hiei added.

Kurama told him to be quiet as a tried to sneak past a group of girls. They spotted him, and stopped him by greeting him while there was giggling in the background.

"You better not, fox," Hiei said.

Kurama kicked the bag Hiei was in. The girls wondered why he did that, and asked him why.

"It means he needs to go to the wash room**(3)**," Hiei joked. "Run, fox, run!"

"Uh... that's probably my friend calling me. He likes to joke a lot," Shuuichi tried to explain.

The girls laughed. "And why'd he call you fox?" one asked.

"He likes to play dress up with his mother," Hiei answered them. "He'll always be the fox."

Shuuichi turned red. He cleared his throat and said, "Well, I better get going." He started walking away.

Kurama found his room and once he got inside, he glared at Hiei.

"What?" Hiei said, shrugging. "The least you could've done was pack some chips in there and I'd be just fine."

"Then how would I explain the crunching?"

"Just say it's your... monkey! Yeah, who's reminding you to... call your mother."

"Yes. Now, I have a monkey munching on chips inside this bag, who's reminding me to call my mom.  
That's a really dumb explanation, Hiei."

"It's only a thought..."

**(1)** He used a spork! How obvious- sarcasm.

**(2)** It's not one of those huge ones.

**(3)** Or as you would know: bathroom. Canadians call it that, and so does my friend, but she's not from Canada and neither am I. Just aZns.

A/N: This is kind of a pointless story... kinda like Napoleon Dynamite, but that was a good movie!


	2. Sitting and Waiting

Disclaimer: I inherited Yu Yu Hakusho from Yoshihiro Togashi, but I illegaly own it. 

A/N: I didn't forget about Yusuke and Kuwabara. It was too much to write, so, here's Chapter 2!

* * *

Kuwabara was sitting in the passenger seat of Yusuke's old mustang. "C'mon, Urameshi!" he shouted. "We're already ten minutes late!"

Yusuke came rushing out of his house.

"Sorry, Kuwabara," Yusuke apologized, putting his stuff in the trunk. He got into the driver's seat and started the car. "I don't know how drunk my mother's gonna get once I leave."

Before Yusuke could actually drive away, Keiko came rushing out of her house towards Yusuke and Kuwabara.

"Keiko!" Yusuke shouted. He looked at the clock, which read 4:11**(1)**. "We were suppose to leave at 4:00. I got us ten minutes late. Now, make that eleven minutes, no thanks to you."

"Well, I'm sorry I made you one minute later! Big deal!" Keiko replied, throwing her bags into the back and getting in.

Yusuke started driving away. Supposedly, the speed limit was 55. Yusuke was driving at 70. Keiko started shouting at him, telling him to slow down.

"Want some chips?" Kuwabara randomly asked.

"No, we don't have time for jokes, Kuwabara," Keiko answered him.

"Suit yourself," Kuwabara said, stuffing his mouth with a handful of chips.

Keiko went back to nagging at Yusuke. "If you don't slow down, the police-" Keiko was cut off by the sound of the police siren.

Yusuke folded his hands together and said to himself, "Thank you for shutting her up, but now, I'm gonna lose all my moolah..."

Yusuke had pulled up to a nearby gas station.

"Oh, Yusuke," Keiko replied, sighing.

"Want some chips now?" Kuwabara asked. Keiko rolled her eyes.

The police guy got out of his car and said, "Sir, I stopped you-"

Yusuke interrrupted, saying, "Yeah, yeah, for going over the speed limit. Okay, here's my stuff and the money."

"You're giving him all you money, dude?" Kuwabara asked, almost gulping.

"What do you think, Kuwabara? These police men can be so demanding these days."

Yusuke turned to the police man and asked for the money that wasn't needed. The man handed Yusuke one dollar.

"One dollar!" Yusuke shouted. "That's it!"

The man looked at the money. "Whoops. Forgot one." He handed another dollar bill to Yusuke.

"Two dollars!"

"Better than one." The man walked too his car and drove away.

* * *

Meanwhile, at Kurama's apartment, the young Shuuichi and the fire demon were waiting for the arrival of Yusuke and Kuwabara.

Kurama looked at his watch and said, "They're late... as usual."

Hiei rolled his eyes and said, "Well, you can't expect two idiots to be on time."

**(1)** For sure, it's definitely, so, not in the morning.

A/N: Well, hope you enjoyed Chapter two! Right now, I'm listenin' to Holiday by Green Day (Hear the sound of the fallin' rain!) See ya next chapter! I'll be on vacation so...


	3. Sad Sad Situation

Disclaimer: I own a DVD of Yu Yu Hakusho, but I don't own Yoshihiro Togashi. 

A/N: I know that the last chapter was pretty short. Well, I'll try to make this as long as I can. ENJOY!

* * *

Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Keiko arrived at the college. Keiko got out of the car with her stuff. Then Yusuke went to go look for a parking space. He found a space next to a Corvette, but as he was pulling in, he dented the Corvette**(1)** with his own car.

Yusuke and Kuwabara got out of the car and looked at the dent.

"Well, it's not as bad as I thought it would be," Kuwabara replied.

"Yeah. Let's just hope this person has the money to pay for this," Yusuke said, agreeing with Kuwabara.

The two idiots walked to their dorm. Before they could knock or do anything, Kurama opened the door.

"Hey, Someone good to see!" Kuwabara exclaimed, giving Kurama a ahem manly hug.

"Yes, Kuwabara. It's nice to see you, too," Kurama replied. "So, what happened?" he asked, after catching his breath from that deadly **(2)** hug.

"Eh, long story," Yusuke answered, unpacking his stuff. "We left late, I got a speeding ticket, and used almost all my money to pay the price, you know the story."

"Well, this is a good start, " Kurama said.

"Yeah, and there was this car we dented while we were parking. It was a pretty nice car too."

"Oh, really? What kind of car was it?"

Yusuke shrugged. "Not sure, but we parked right next to it."

Shuuichi looked outside the window, as he asked what car Yusuke had driven.

"A blue mustang. It's pretty old. Not that hard to spot."

Kurama spotted the old car. "Yeah... that is quite a nice car... considering that it's mine."

Yusuke and Kuwabara stopped what they were doing. They looked at each other, then looked at Kurama.

Kurama had a serious face on. Then he shouted, "Psyche!" He started laughing **(3)**.

The two looked at each other (again) and started laughing too.

"Really?" Yusuke asked, still laughing. "That's not your car?"

Kurama chuckled. "Oh, Yusuke, it certainly is my car."

Yusuke and Kuwabara instantly stopped laughing, as the whole room was engulfed in silence.

"Hey, man. We're really sorry," Kuwabara apologized.

"Yeah," Yusuke agreed. "If you want, we can pay for the damage or something."

"We?" Hiei repeated. "Who's we? You just told us that you spent most of your money on a speeding ticket. Your pockets are probably just filled with lint."

"Shutup, midget! And since when were you invited?"

Shuuichi stepped between them and said, "No need for arguments, now. I'm pretty sure damage isn't that bad."

"Nope. We checked it out for ourselves," Kuwabara said.

"That is a pretty sweet ride, " a voice sounded out.

"Oh, boy," Yusuke replied.

Koenma appearted.

"Great, now we have a baby to babysit."

"Baby?" Koenma repeated. "And why would I want to stay here, especially around two dumbfounded fools.

Yusuke sighed. "What do you want with us?"

Koenma cleared his throat. "I heard about your big trip. I never thought two bakas like you could even make it."

"What're you, stalking us?" Kuwabara asked, quite nervously.

"Well..."

-Flashback-

Kuwabara was in the bathtub, surrounded by toy boats. "Okay, Mr. Ducky, time to come in," he said, gleefully.

Koenma was watching at thetime in his palace. Then he started laughing out loud **(4)**. He called for Ayame and Botan, telling them to take a look at this scene.

Ayame started laughing at the sight, while Botan just stared.

"I find it a bit odd, Koenma, that you are actually... spying on him, but it is quite funny"  
Botan replied.

The three kept laughing as Kuwabara stopped to say, "Oh, boy... I have that weird feeling as if someone were watching me. So scary." Then, he closed the shower curtain, ending the comedic moment.

"Well, that's just too bad," Koenma said, evily grinning.

"What do you mean, Koenma sir?" Botan asked, a bit puzzled.

"I must've accidentally pushed the record button... on purpose while the tape was in. I bet Yusuke would like to see this."

"I'm not so sure, Koenma," Botan replied, giggling as she left.

-End Flashback-

Koenma was about to burst out laughing when he said, "Never mind. Better get going. Bye"  
and he disappeared.

"What's his problem?" Hiei said, emotionlessly.

"Never mind him," Yusuke said, without a care. "About your car, Kurama-"

"It's okay, Yusuke," Kurama interrupted him. "I can fix it."

Yusuke thought for a moment. Suddenly, his head popped up **(5)**. "I know what'll cheer you up"  
he said, happily.

Kurama just stared at them.

"Orange Mocha Frappuccinos! **(6)**" Kuwabara and Yusuke said at the same time.

As Kurama's two friends ran out the door, Hiei said to Kurama, "I can''t believe they're your room-  
mates."

* * *

**(1)** I feel stupid writing Corvette.

**(2)** Deadly... nice word, huh?

**(3)** I know what you're thinking: what did I do to Kurama!

**(4)** Obviously, Kuwabara's having a llittle free time...

**(5)** Pop goes the weasel!

**(6)** I got this idea from Zoolander. It just suddenly came out of nowhere.

* * *

A/N: Well, another chapter gone by. I'm pretty sure this chapter is longer than the last... but anyways, KuwabaraMikey17, I hope what I wrote about Kuwabara isn't offending to you in anyway. Other things: I'm gonna do a one-shot Inuyasha. Some of the characters will be in an eating contest and I need some ideas for food, good and tastey or disgusting Fear Factor style. Well, Ja-ne !


	4. Good Times

Disclaimer: I do not own any merchandise from Yoshihiro Togashi whatsoever. I'm telling you the whole truth,  
and nothing, but the truth... 

A/N: It's been a while... so, the rest of these crazy events are based on the stupid-funny things I've done with my friends. Hey, Shiruba Fokkusu, you should recognize these.

* * *

Yusuke, Kuwabara, Shuuichi, and Hiei, were all on their way to a nearby Starbucks. Yusuke and Kuwabara went in to pick up the drinks, while Shuuichi and Hiei sat in the car. 

"How exactly did we get tricked into this?" Hiei asked a bit angrily.

Shuuichi just shrugged with a small grin, as Yusuke and Kuwabara walked out of the coffee store with big smiles, the drinks, a small bag.

"Hey, what's in the bag, Urameshi?" Kuwabara asked, excited.

Yusuke stuck his hand in the bag, and reached for what was inside. He pulled his hand out, and Kuwabara loudly read, "NUTTER BUTTERS! My favorite!"

The two started munching on the peanut-buttery snacks Shuuichi and Hiei sat in silence. Then, Yusuke turned around and offered some of the munchies to Shuuichi and Hiei. The red-headed one declined, and Hiei pushed Yusuke's hand away, muttering something that sounded like "idiot".

Yusuke shrugged and turned to Kuwabara. "Hey, Kuwabara, want a 'Nutter Butter'?"

The two idiots instantly started laughing.

"Oh, I get it!" Kuwabara exclaimed. "Your trying to ask me if I want another Nutter Butter!Hahaha!"

Hiei rolled his eyes and shook his head saying, "How did we end up with such pathetic goofballs?"

On the way back, Yusuke turned the radio on. A tune played lowly, and then you could hear Yusuke let out a loud gasp.

"What is it this time?" Hiei asked, not at all curious.

"It's that song!" Yusuke reached to turn the volume up. Then, you could clearly hear what song he was indeed talking about. "I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly! I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky! Nanana, nanana, lalala, and break away!"

Soon enough, you could also hear Kuwabara break into song, joining Yusuke on the next line.

Hiei looked at them with wrath in his eyes. "If they keep this up, I'll jump out of this car, and hope to get runover."

"Now, there's no need for that kind of behavior, Strawberry Shortcake!" Yusuke said, gleefully.

"Would you rather have me kill you?"

"Now, there's no need for that, my sweet friend... of mine! Okay, if we can't do that, then... I know! Kuwabara, get out 'The If Book'."

"Yessir!" Kuwabara reached under the seat, and sat up holding a book that read "The If Book".

"Start reading, my friend."

"Okay, if you were to have any pet in the world, what would it be?"

Yusuke looked at Kuwabara, and Kuwabara looked back. "You know what that would be, Kuwabara?"

"What, Urameshi?"

The two goofballs shouted at the top of their lungs: "MANATEES!"

Hiei and Shuuichi sat in the back, trying to ignore all the commotion going on in the front.

"Okay, one more question, Kuwabara."

"Right... if you were to get an autograph from any person, who would it be and where would that person sign?"

"Oooh! I know! I know! I'd get it from that guy from that really popular J-Pop band... on my forehead!"

"Ya, man! That's what I'm talkin about!" Kuwabara raised his hand so Yusuke could give him a hi-five.

Hiei sat in the back with a bored look on his face, saying to himself, "Do they ever stop?"

* * *

A/N: Well, that's it for now. How tiring is this? Well, I know this was a pointless chapter, but hey, it's enjoyable,  
right? Well... I gotta stop saying well. Tata for now! 


	5. A New Start

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho, but I sure wish I did. 

A:N: Well, here's another round of stupid events based on my friends and me doing... well, if you read the last chapter, you'll see.

* * *

Yusuke drove his friends back to his place. Once they entered Yusuke's room, Yusuke himself ran to the kitchen, and came back holding a carton of ice cream and just enough bowls and spoons for everyone. 

"Hey everyone!" Yusuke shouted to get attention. "Who wants ice cream!"

Kuwabara sat up, alert of the words that were just declared, and repeated those words, "Ice cream!  
Ya! Ice cream!" He ran up to Yusuke and grabbed the carton of ice cream right out of his hands. The bowls almost fell out of Yusuke's hands and nearly crashed to the ground, but Yusuke tried to keep the dishes balanced in his grasp.

Kuwabara ran back to short one and red-head.

"I pass," Hiei said, without giving a chance for Kuwabara to ask him if he wanted any.

Kuwabara replied, "Now wait a minute! I haven't asked yet!"

"You're just too slow. Plus, it was obvious what you were going to ask."

Kuwabara grumbled, giving up, and turned to Kurama and asked him. The young Shuuichi lifted his hand,  
his palm facing Kuwabara, showing that the red-head passed too.

"Geez, you guys aren't any fun!" Kuwabara gave the ice cream to Yusuke, who offered to scoop it into one of the bowls.

"Just forget about them," Yusuke said, without any care. "They don't know what fun is."

The two started chowing down on the food that was in front of them. Kuwabara went for a second serving, and as he did, Hiei noticed something on his face. It was white, like the vanilla color of the ice cream they were eating. The short one turned to Shuuichi to whisper something in his ear. Then, trying to hold back, broke out into laughter.

"At least he's not black," Hiei added. "Cause if he was, then that would be a white mole on a black person!"

Hiei burst out laughing, and Shuuichi surprisingly did so too. Yusuke and Kuwabara looked up at them with confused looks. Soon enough, the other two stopped laughing, and the ones eating returned to their consumption.

Later that evening, Yusuke found his apartment empty without his friends. He knew that tomorrow was the first day of another life: his first day of college.

That day came, and when Yusuke woke up, he felt as miserable as ever. He took every second of his time, not wanting the time to come. Before he could leave, he heard a knock on his door. He opened it to find Kuwabara standing there, looking happy and better than Yusuke himself.

"Ready?" Kuwabara asked, with an exciting tone in his voice.

"Ya, ya," Yusuke answered with misery.

They walked to school along the sidewalk path that led to the school. "Hey, dude, don't worry," Kuwabara said,  
trying to get Yusuke to feel better.

"Ya, easy for you to say," Yusuke replied.

"C'mon, today's suppose to be an easy day. No homework or anything!" At the same time, they passed by a gumball machine that Kuwabara instantly noticed. "Hey! Let's get some gumballs, and you know..."

Yusuke paused, and then a smile appeared on his face. He finished Kuwabara's statement, "And sort them by color in our mouths? No way would I pass that chance! Plus, those babies are super huge!"

The two pulled out all the quarters they had, and inserted them into the machine. They each got five gumballs.

"Okay, there's green and blue, and we have to sort them in our mouths. Ready?... Set... Go!"

The two stuck all their gumballs into their mouths, and started to sort them as they continued walking to school.  
When they arrived at the school, they walked up to Shuuichi still sorting the gumballs.

"Um, what are you doing?" Shuuichi asked, a bit puzzled.

Yusuke answered, trying to tell him that they were sorting gumballs in their mouths, but it was hard to understand what he said because of all the gumballs in his mouth. Shuuichi pretended to understand him, and then walked off. The other two just shrugged, and resumed their sorting.

Then Yusuke suddenly shouted out, "I think I got it!"

Kuwabara went over to Yusuke and checked his open mouth to see if the gumballs were sorted. Then he replied,  
"Oh man! You win."

Yusuke jumped up with joy and success, while a few gumballs fell from his mouth "Ya! Who da man? I da man!"

"That was just luck," Kuwabara said, a bit disappointed.

Yusuke stopped and smiled, with red and green all over his mouth, and said, "Alright, you teachers! Here I come!"

* * *

A:N: Hopefully that was longer than the last chapter. Whew! That took a while to write up, but it was fun!I hope that you will laugh at least once... twice maybe? 


	6. More Idiocy

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho... well that was blunt... James Blunt... Bond... James Bond.  
ARGH! Enough already! 

A:N: Ah, so many stupid memories. Are your classmates this dumb? Unfortunately, mine were, specifically, the boys. But my lesbian friend thinks they're cool (she's so retarded...). Well, I'm one of the unlucky ones that will be stuck with most of them for another four years. Enough of this crap. Here's your enjoyment for the day!

* * *

Yusuke and Kuwabara walked down the unfamiliar hallways, people making their way through the traffic with their books. 

"I'm scared, Urameshi," Kuwabara said in discouragement.

Yusuke crossed his arms, saying, "Oh, please, you baby. I was the one that was scared."

"I guess it's contageous."

The two kept walking. Then, Yusuke saw a familiar face walking towards their direction.

"Well, if it isn't Keiko," Yusuke said, teasing Keiko in his usual ways.

Keiko placed her hands on her hips, again, angered by a teasing Yusuke. "Yusuke! Do you know when to stop!"

Yusuke smiled, displaying his teeth. "Geez, don't have to be a goody-tooshoos," he commented, patting Keiko's back.

Keiko became even more angered. "I'm not a goody-tooshoos!"

"Ya, can't even sneak an ounce of pot into class..."

The annoyed Keiko crossed her arms in resentment. "I'm sure you've done it plenty of times. Besides, I wouldn't do something that dumb. My brain isn't that small."

Yusuke turned to Kuwabara. "Well, that means..." Then, he broke into the song, "She don't like, she don't like.  
cocaine." **(1)**

"Very amusing," Keiko replied, faking a smile, then rolling her eyes as she left.

"Sorry, Miss A!" Yusuke shouted, as she walked away." The two left behind started laughing like little kids, and continued their way to their first class, according to what their schedule said.

They stopped in front of a door, which led to the first class for Yusuke and Kuwabara.

"Man, why does history have to be the first class of the day!" Kuwabara said, a bit angered.

Yusuke didn't reply, but simply opened the door to the classroom. Inside, other students had occupied themselves by taking up the seats in the back of the room. The only seats left were at the very front, closest to the teacher's desk.

"Man, the worst seats in the house," Yusuke said, as some of the other students laughed at the two who took a seat up front.

Then, the door opened, and all the students became quiet. A male voice suddenly spoke, saying, "Ladies and gentlemen. Introducing, your history teacher!"

Then, a man came dancing in, singing:  
"I am really special 'cause there's only one of me.  
Look at my smile I'm so damn happy, other people are jealous of me.  
When I'm sad and only, I like to sing this song.  
It cheers me up, it show's me that I won't be sad for long.  
Oh oh oh I'm so happy, I can barely breath." **(2)**

The man stopped singing to catch his breath. After a while of heavy inhaling and exhaling, he spoke, "Hello! I am Mr. Ugisaki, and I am your crazy, loco, history teacher** (3)**! Let me tell, you I love to have fun, but I can't have the class acting up. I follow the rules just like every other teacher, so, we can have fun, but don't make me send you to detention. Now, a little about myself... I love to joke around. So, that means, I like telling you guys puns."

A few students rolled their eyes, and some replying with "Oh boy...".

"Okay, now, give me a shot... got it. Uh, is anyone into art, drawing? Anybody?"

A girl sitting behind Yusuke quietly raised her hand.

The teacher noticed, and said, "Okay, young lady. I have a question for you... what did the cowboy artist say to the other cowboy artist?"

The girl shrugged.

Mr. Ugisaki made his hands look like guns, and pointed them to the class, saying, "It's a draw!" He instantly started laughing out loud, but none of the students joined him. They stared at this somewhat idiotic teacher with dull expressions. Soon, the laughing came to an end.

"Hey, you had a gun," a guy in the back of the class said dumbly. "Isn't that, like, not allowed in school."

Mr. Ugisaki held out his hand, shaping it into an L. "Oh, that's not a gun. It's an L."

Before long, the teacher stopped with joking, and went about with his business with the class, handing out textbooks, and explaining a few things.

Later, the bell for class to end, rang aloud. Most of the students got up almost all at once, heading for the door.

As Yusuke was gathering his stuff, he turned to the girl behind him. "So, you like to draw?" He looked down at her desk to see a notebook with a person well drawn with black ink.

The girl reached to close her notebook, and answering Yusuke's question. "Yes," she said, a bit shyly.

"Well, I'm Yusuke," the slick-headed boy said, sticking his hand out, offering a hand shake.

The girl looked at his hand, and back at Yusuke, taking his hand, shaking it. "I'm Kasumi."

"Oh, so you talk?"

Kasumi smiled, and walked past Yusuke, heading for the door.

Yusuke took his stuff and ran after her. "Well, hey, it's nice meeting you. You can think of me as a clown.  
speaking of which, I have a joke. Why did the turtle cross the road? I'll give you a hint: take the 'f' out of 'free' and the 'f' out of 'way'."

Kasumi stood for a moment, thinking for a while. Yusuke stood in front of her, waiting for the answer.

Finally, Kasumi spoke up, saying, "But there is no 'f' in 'way'."

Yusuke got excited, and said, "Okay, listen to what you just said. What does it sound like?"

Kasumi repeated her answer in her head a few times, and then at last, realizing what it sounded like, she said,  
"Oh, I get it." **(4)**

Yusuke smiled at her and let out a chuckle, which made Kasumi blush.

Then, a voice called out, "Yusuke Urameshi!"

Yusuke turned to see a fuming Keiko, stomping her way to Yusuke.

"What!" was all Yusuke could say, as Keiko grabbed his ear and dragged him away. Kasumi blinked, a bit puzzled about what was going on.

Keiko led Yusuke to the end of the hallway, away from where Yusuke once was.

"Is someone having a bad day?" Yusuke asked, amusingly.

Keiko just stood there frowning at him.

"Well, if your feeling bad, I can rub your tummy."** (5)**

"Yusuke!"

Yusuke waved his hands around, a bit stupidly. "What?"

Keiko turned and stomped away, rolling her eyes.

"What'd I do?" Yusuke tried shouting to her. But Keiko just ignored. "Geez, what's wrong with her... oh well..."

* * *

**(1)** It's a song by... I forgot (is it Eric Clapton?), but anyways, the title of the song is "Cocaine". Good song. 

**(2)**This song is by Liam Lynch. It is called "Happy". It's only about a minute long, but I find it funny. I couldn't put all the lyrics in because... well, it wasn't really necessary.

**(3)** I actually had a crazy history teacher too. He also made puns (puns that no one laughed at) and is the size of a leprechaun... that's exaggerating a bit, but he is pretty short.

**(4)** My friend told me this joke. If you don't get it, it sounds like "there is no f-ing way". Get it now? If not, ponder for a bit...

**(5)** This event actually happened to me. We were on a class trip, and one day, I wasn't feeling to well. So at dinner, I didn't eat anything, and this guy from my class, sitting next to me, said that to me. I couldn't really get mad cause I didn't really have the energy to.

* * *

A:N: Well, that's it for now. I didn't mean to put in an OC, but I couldn't think of any other way to put in "the turtle joke". Anyway, hoped you enjoyed. TTFN! R&R! 


	7. Twice the Idiocy

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. 

A:N: Kon'nichiwa, minna-san! I know it's been a while since I've updated (trash me if you'd like), but summer's been sorta crazy, but fun! The sad part is: it is about to end (sighs). I think summer went by a little too fast. I hope I can find someone who likes anime when school starts. That's the only thing I'm thinking about right now (at least when it comes to that). Well, for all you World Cup fans, the women's World Cup is going to be held next year in China. Can't wait! Well, here's more intelligence (and idiocy!).

* * *

After a few more boring classes in the morning, Yusuke made his way to the lunchroom. He saw Shuuichi taking a seat across from Kuwabara and Keiko making her way towards them. Yusuke walked over to the group.

"Hey, Kuwabara, I saw a few soda machines on my way here. I'll be back, 'kay?" Yusuke said, setting his lunch on the table and making his leave.

"Urameshi! Get me something too!" Kuwabara shouted back to him, and letting a few morsels of food shoot out of his mouth, landing on Shuuichi's face.

"Kuwabara," Shuuichi growled at Kuwabara, wiping the soggy chunks of food off his face. "Didn't your mother ever tell you to-"

"Oh, no you don't! You're coming with me!" Yusuke exclaimed, interrupting Shuuichi's sentence. He grabbed Kuwabara by the collar and dragged him away.

Shuuichi sighed, and went back to eating his lunch.

Kuwabara and Yusuke walked down a small hallway. They eventually reached a soda machine with a snack machine standing right next to it. There was a sign next to the machines that read: "Students not allowed to buy snacks/sodas during any time of the day."

"That's a bunch of bull," Yusuke replied. He took out some quarters and started inserting them into the machine.

"Wait, Urameshi!" Kuwabara exclaimed. "Didn't you read the sign? We can't do that!"

"Please, Kuwabara. You're starting to sound like Keiko."

Then, footsteps echoed the hallways. The sound steadily became louder.

Kuwabara froze and stood there shocked while Yusuke continued by pressing the numbers to buy his soda. Whenever, Yusuke would press a button, it would make a loud beeping sound.

"Urameshi, shouldn't we go? We shouldn't be here," Kuwabara suggested.

The footsteps moved even faster, and became even louder.

"Just wait, K-" Yusuke looked to where Kuwabara had stood, but he was already gone. He looked around the corner and there was Kuwabara at the end of the hall, heading towards the lunchroom. "What an idiot..."

He turned to resume buying his soda, but there in front of him stood the biggest man on campus... the head of the school.

"Oh, Muku-sama," Yusuke replied, smiling idiotically. "I... heh, was just..."

"So," this Muku-sama started, "already causing trouble, mister... what's your name?"

"Yusuke Urameshi."

"Mister Urameshi. Hmph. Didn't you learn to read in preschool?" he asked, pointing to the sign.

Yusuke frowned.

"I'll leave you with a warning, Mister Urameshi, but if I catch you next time causing any trouble, I'm telling you, the consequences won't be pretty." And with that, he reached into the bottom of the machine and grabbed the soda intended for Yusuke, and walked away.

Yusuke made his way back to the lunchroom, irritated. He seated himself between Kuwabara and Shuuichi.

"So, Urameshi, did you get your soda?" Kuwabara asked him.

Yusuke grabbed him by the collar. "What do you think, idiot!"

"Okay, okay. Sorry..."

"I hate Muku-sama. He's a little cuckoo up here," Yusuke said, pointing to his brain.

"Why? What'd he do?"

"HE TOOK MY DAMN SODA!" Yusuke shouted, grabbing Kuwabara by the neck with both of his hands, shaking him.

"Okay, okay!"

"You two, settle down!" Keiko nagged. "I don't know why you have to cause so much trouble for yourself, Yusuke!"

"I'm thirsty," Yusuke complained. "I forgot to bring something to drink."

"Oh, you poor baby," Keiko said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Well, if you're such a Ms. Goody-good, lend me something to drink!"

Angered at Yusuke, Keiko reached inside her bag and slammed an energy drink can in front of him.

"Energy drink?" Yusuke said, looking at the can and raising an eyebrow.

"It's all I have, Yusuke. I'm sorry."

"Feh," Yusuke replied. "Better be."

He took a sip of his drink, but before he could swallow it down, he spit it back out onto the person sitting next to him. Can you guess who? Yes, indeed. Our very own Shuuichi Minamino.

"God! That tastes horrible! Why the hell do you carry this damn thing around, Keiko!" Yusuke exclaimed. He looked to the person he spat the drink at. There sat a drenched Shuuichi. "Woops! Sorry there!"

Shuuichi did not say a word. He got up from his seat and walked out of the lunch room.

"Hmph." Yusuke grabbed his bag of chips, opened it, and started munching on them. Some of the salt had stuck to his finger tips. "Hey, what do you think it's like to sniff salt, Kuwabara?"

"I don't know, Urameshi. Why don't you try..."

Yusuke looked at his salt-covered finger for a moment. Then, he held it up to his nose and inhaled quite loudly. Once he was done, he looked at his finger again, and nothing was left on it. Suddenly, he felt a tingling sensation in his nose and slight stinging.

"OH GOD!" he exclaimed, covering his nose. Then, he started sneezing, constantly, every few seconds. He grabbed the energy drink and gulped it down, and this time, actually swallowing it. After finishing the whole can, he placed it down with a dissatisfied expression.

"Yusuke..." Keiko growled.

Yusuke let out a sigh of relief. "Ah... I'm never doing that again..."

Keiko crossed her arms in anger. "Yusuke, I swear..."

"No you don't."

"Shut up, Yusuke!"

"Hmph." Yusuke sat back in his chair, continuing with his meal.

"So what was it like, Urameshi?" Kuwabara asked, trying to hold back his fit of laughter.

Yusuke evilly smiled. "You wanna know, Kuwabara?"

"Uh, yeah. Isn't that what I said?"

Before Kuwabara knew it, he felt something stuck up his nose. He realized it was Yusuke's finger. Then, Kuwabara, himself, felt a tingle in his nose. Yusuke pulled his finger out, grabbed his lunch, and left.

"Urameshi achoo! I'm achoo gonna get you achoo!" Kuwabara exclaimed following him.

Keiko rolled her eyes and followed.

* * *

Keiko and Yusuke were in the same class that followed lunch.

"Hey, Keiko, can I borrow a pen?" Yusuke asked her (nicely, for once).

Keiko reached into her bag and handed him a pen. It looked brand new and it had a button towards the top of it.

"Oooooh, what does this do?" Yusuke curiously asked in a sort of high-pitched voice. He pressed the button and a red dot appeared on the wall behind Keiko.

"It's a laser pointer, Yusuke. Can you please not do anything stupid for once? I like that pen, so please don't get it taken away."

"You gave your favorite pen to me? How sweet of you, Keiko," Yusuke said, pretending to be embarrassed. Then, he pointed the laser to Keiko's forehead. "Hey, Keiko! Now you're an Arab!"

Keiko snatched the pen from him. She opened the top and took out the batteries.

"You're no fun..." Yusuke muttered.

She handed the pen back to Yusuke. They entered the classroom and a man with a head full of short hair except for this one bald spot.

"Welcome," he said, smiling.

Once all the students were seated, he began his speech, talking about the rules and all the crap the teacher like to talk about, like there family and things that'll happen during this class.

Bored to death, Yusuke started pressing the button that would've turned the laser pointer on. Click, click, click, click,  
click...

"Excuse me, young sir," he said to Yusuke. "You are disrupting my class. Please cease your nonsense."

The man went back to talking.

Then, Yusuke started to rapidly tap the pen on the desk. Then, the teacher's face popped out of nowhere in front of Yusuke.

He looked down and pointed to his bald spot so Yusuke could see. "You see this! This is a bald spot. And you know why it's there?"

Yusuke shrugged. "Because you're aging?"

"YOU'RE MAKING ME ANGRY!"

Yusuke, with a dull expression on his face, dropped the pen onto the desk.

"And don't pick it up again until I tell you to." The teacher, again, went back to his speech.

Yusuke looked down at the pen. Then he heard the teacher say loudly, "Everyone, I want you to write at least one full page about yourself and what you plan to be once you finish college. It will be turned in fifteen minutes before this class ends. Begin."

Everyone prepared to write by taking out sheets of paper and utensils to write with. Yusuke didn't react and just sat there, staring off into space.

The teacher paced up and down the rows of desks, checking on if the students were writing. Once he got to Yusuke, he bent down to whisper into his hear, "That includes you too, boy." And he walked to the front of the class and stood there.

"That includes you too, boy," Yusuke muttered to himself in a high-pitched voice, and started to write.

* * *

A:N: Well, that's the end of another chapter. I hope you enjoyed! It would be honored if you reviewed (bows). And I'm sorry it took so long to update. I promise to do better next time. TTFN! 


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